My life is about as organized as a $5 DVD bin at Walmart. Life taught me a lot of lessons but I banked those classes. An optimist believes we live in the best of all possible worlds. Love for all, Hatred for none. 3) Slow Internet. Life is short, and it is here to be lived. Part 2: Funny WhatsApp Status Quotes. Success always hugs you in private but failure always slaps you in public. This could be anything from a green dot to indicate you’re available to chat, an away message, or a serious threat against anyone who dare disturb you. My teachers told me I’d never amount to much because I procrastinate so much. Girls are like police. Daily updated collection of awesome and unique status to express your feelings and situation on Whatsapp, twitter or facebook. I’m so cool I wasn’t actually born, I was defrosted. You seem to be on your own path. People think that you fall in love only once. Among the messaging services, WhatsApp has taken over the world because of its simple interface and many features. I work out every day I do 1 sit-up every morning when I wake up. And I can lose weight! My relationship status? It’s a new millennium, where’s the “Fold” button on my dryer? Unless you think I’m awesome. Laziness Is The Mother Of All Bad Habits But Ultimately She Is A Mother And We Should Respect Her. The show was called Spongebob Squarepants, but everyone knows the star was Patrick. Then we met. You can also send out an active status update to all of your contacts to let them know you’re ready to talk! Improve your performance by improving your attitude. “Breathe, man! Your email address will not be published. I told them, “Just you wait!”. Don’t forget to save this page and come back to it when you need to post another funny status! All the life I thought air is free until I bought a bag of chips. I’m reading a book on the history of glue – I can’t put it down. I’m not anti-fashion, but I’ve always had a bit of a punk attitude. More Best Funny Whatsapp Status and Quotes. I don’t have a dirty mind, I have a sexy imagination. I’m cool but global warming made me very hot; Marriage is the cause of divorce.! Got a new phone today, my old one failed the swimming test. Tap the “Status” tab between the “Chats” and “Calls” tab at the top of the app. Not because I don’t love you. People are more often seen carrying a smartphone in their hands, taking photos, and posting them on their social media accounts. ... Good Morning Whatsapp Status, Beautiful & Funny Morning Quotes. Make sure that the phrases define who you are. We’ve got a whole bunch of funny Instagram captions. Hashtag time! But I’m unique! 6 Friendship Whatsapp Status. There are billions of people who are using the platform to express themselves and upload their photos. We cannot change anything unless we accept it. A man in love is incomplete until he is married. 2) Slow Internet. 2)Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I’m tired of solving them for you. Make love to her like you’re the best. If everyone knew what I was thinking, I would get punched in the face a lot. A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days. No, I’m not feeling violent, I’m feeling creative with weapons. Describe yourself in the most awesome way possible with these lines. Being an adult is just walking around wondering what you’re forgetting. People may hear your words but they feel your attitude. So this post includes latest funny whatsapp status 2018. won’t be impressed with technology until I can download food. I have enough money to last me the rest of my life unless I buy something. We’ve compiled these funny WhatsApp statuses that you can try and out it on your bio. My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right. Guys have no idea how long something they said can stay in a girl’s mind. So we compromised and got a puppy. Check out these funny WhatsApp status and about me that your friends will love. Join over 260,000 subscribers! Fair warning: I know karate. Anyone can catch your eye, but it takes someone special to catch your heart. Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? When a couple is arguing over who loves who more, the one that gives up is the real winner. It’s not only the girls who like to make an effort for their social media statuses, boys feel the same way too. If it had four doors, it would be a chicken sedan. You drink too much and gossip too much. We’ll see about that. I want to be invited but I don’t want to go. Because if they fell forward they’d still be in the boat. I didn’t even know they were Catholic. Excellence is not a skill, It is an attitude. Funny WhatsApp status is a way to display an unusual side of your personality to others. There is only one master copy and rest all is photocopy. I recently gave up Warcraft, so my productivity and drinking have increased dramatically. Hey, I’ll be back in five minutes. I never argue, I just explain why I’m right. The minute you think of giving up think of the reason why you held on so long. WE have some pretty awesome and impressive funny WhatsApp status lines for you too. A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. It’s not that I hate anyone; it’s just that I do not like people. I’d tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn’t get a reaction. So please visit. I do what I must, and my friends will adjust! Fashion is about something that comes from within you. Do not drink and park accidents cause people. Just saw the most smartest person when i was in front of the mirror. Required fields are marked *. Chat me when you miss me. He’s also dreaming. WhatsApp statuses are not only for serious communication. Looks like I over-estimated the number of your brain cells. I just have a violent reaction when I meet stupid people. And I’m ideal. She said “thanks, that means a lot!”. Self-love is the elixir of an immortal heart. Before I criticize a man, I like to walk a mile in his shoes. That awkward moment when you’re wearing Nike’s and you can’t do it. I fall in love every time I see you. It’s just there and visible, so you can literally tell people what you’re doing. Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Wedding Ring, 3. But always with you. That’s life. What did one snowman say to the other one? Being someone’s first love may be great, but to be their last is beyond perfect. Beware of the dog…the cat is also pretty shady. If a hug tells how much I love you, I will hold you in my arms forever. Dear God, there is a bug in your software. Pink Isn’T Just A Colour, It’S An Attitude ! I Don’T Always Get Asked Out On A Date. Teachers call it cheating, students call it teamwork. In my house I’m the boss, my wife is just the decision maker. I’m at the point now where I don’t want to impress anyone anymore. This does not effect our editorial in any way. Let it be unique for yourself and yet identifiable for others. Dear humans, in case you forgot, I used to be your Internet. Me? My wife and I were happy for twenty years. You think I’m cute when I’m mad? Don’t you hate it when people answer their own questions? Love doesn’t make the world go round. What are your other two wishes? …and some other words. Never steal. We share handwritten guides to boost your Social Media Marketing genuinely. I don’t love the way you lie. My wife dresses to kill. A Birthday is the most special day in one’s life. I’m not drunk, I’m just chemically off-balanced. It doesn’t like you either. I may be fat, but you’re ugly. Here you get Top & Best Very Funny Whatsapp Status Of 2020. 99% of the time,we forgive people because we still want them in our lives. Today I have the motivation of a potato. The sinking of the Titanic was a miracle for the lobsters in the ship’s kitchen. I can only please one person a day. I’m on a whiskey diet…I’ve lost three days already. The world could be amazing when you are slightly strange. My biggest concern in life is actually how my online friends can be informed of my death. Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies. I just need … Home Captions Ideas 101 Ideas for a Funny WhatsApp Status – Short and Unique. Honest people can be put into two categories….little kids and drunk persons. Here you will find the most funny collection of video status & Awesome comedy Funny movie scene Video Status. I’m a glowstick – I had to break before I could shine. We now have 450 sweatshirts, and they’re all in her closet. I’m the world’s best dentist. I saw an ad for burial plots, and thought to myself this is the last thing I need. These pictures span different categories ranging from cool to funny and even romantic. One hat says to the other, “You stay here, I’ll go on a head.”, A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, “Make me one with everything.”, The bill came to $50. You will also have a collection of Funny Whatsapp Status in the below sections. Get up every morning, imagine a future then make it happen. Love is a real drug, that’s why you’re my dealer! I have a new theory in life…what other people think of me is truly none of my business! Sleep is my drug… my bed is my dealer and my alarm clock is the police. When he did, I asked him why he was ignoring me. I’m not changed it’s just I grew up and you should try too. Make your weird light shine bright, so the other weirdos know where to find you. Being weird is the side effect of awesomeness. Breathe!”. Don’t let your WhatsApp status dry up with boring one-liners, use these quotes to your hearts’ content! Fruit flies like a banana. They have no guarantee! Told my wife I wanted our kids every other weekend and she reminded me that we’re married and live together so I’d have to see them every day. Oh, yes, I miss You. When it comes to getting a quick message to nearly anyone in the world, modern techno-users have plenty of options. If the school has taught us anything, it’s texting without looking. WhatsApp Status quotes, for most people, is the medium through which they get to express themselves, opinion, beliefs and disbeliefs. Kill tension before tensions kill you, reach your goal before goal kicks you, live life before life leaves you. If you dislike me, remember: it’s mind over matter. My wife and I were happy for twenty years. You’ve stuck around enough time! My wife just found out I replaced our bed with a trampoline; she hit the roof. I’m simply on reserve for the one who deserves my heart. I want to be invited but I don’t want to go. Prairie Home Companion Pretty Good Joke Book, funny names for your online group hangout, How To Change Location or Region in TikTok, How To Record Without Holding the Button in Snapchat, How To View Private Facebook Profiles & Pictures [October 2020], How To Find Deleted Friends in the Snapchat App, The Best Tinder Pickup Lines [January 2020], How To Claim an Inactive Instagram Username Account. Add a new picture or video and a caption. I’m great at multitasking. I hope when I inevitably choke to death on gummy bears people just say I was killed by bears and leave it at that. If you’re looking for a funny WhatsApp status to make your friends chuckle, we’ve got some great suggestions for you. Enjoy! Here are some of the funny WhatsApp status ideas you can put in your profiles! It is a catalyst and it sparks extraordinary results. Laughter is always, always the best medicine. I’d tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn’t get a reaction. The bad news is it’s the kind of smile that people should fear. Sometimes I think I’m too picky, but then I watch my dog look for a place to poop. Don’t worry about what I’m doing, worry about why you’re worried about what I’m doing. Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. This makes the feature kind of a combination of the old-school status and a short Facebook or Twitter update. (Hilarious + LOL), +99 Popular and Trendy TikTok Quotes 2020, +99 Motivating and Inspiring Pinterest Quotes on Life, +290 Amazing and heartwarming Pinterest Quotes on Love. Good Samaritan, washed-up athlete, especially gifted napper. Copy and paste the ones you like! Love does not consists of gazing at each other, but in looking together in the same direction. 5) Never Give Up On Your Dreams. I don’t even know why I like you. Stir in Cool Audio: InShot. I didn’t say it was your fault, I said I am blaming you. Sometimes you just have to throw on a crown and remind them who they’re dealing with. Having a soft heart in a cruel world is courage, not weakness. 101 Ideas for a Funny WhatsApp Status – Short and Unique. woman. Check out some of our compilations below. Again, this is an easy copy and paste compilation so use the quotes to your heart’s desire! If the brain is dominant, why doesn’t everyone use it? Then you might want to consider these funny quotes and sayings. If you are looking for some funny whatsapp status messages then you have just reached at the right place. Because they’re so good at it. I got my CAPS LOCK ON. They are irresponsible. Let’s be friends. It was just that the floor needed some cleaning. Funny Whatsapp Status in English Funny Whatsapp Status in English. Look the world straight in the eye. It’s about that very moment when you’re doing something and wishing they were right here with you. My life makes about as much sense as a screen door on a submarine. Women spend more time wondering what men are thinking than men spend thinking. It’s the good girls who keep diaries;the bad girls never have the time. I replied, Still looking for a FREE Wi-Fi connection! Being original is difficult…you can’t be like me. Drink until you become the greatest philosopher in your world! Remember:  Brevity is the soul of wit. Everybody wishes they could go to heaven, but no one wants to die. That’s important, I think. Don’t be so happy! Unique status for WhatsApp “Cherish forever what makes you unique, ‘cuz you’re really a yawn if it goes.” “I believe a unique core self is born into every human being; the result of millennia of environment and heredity combined in an unpredictable way that I’m not saying you’ve got problems, but have you tried turning yourself off and rebooting? I am what I am… I will never try to be someone else. Your Attitude + Your Choices = Your Life. Insert a bit of humor to your about me profile. Girls are the expressive gender in the spectrum. Don’T Need It. Can we please go back to the main menu of life? I pressed the home button, but I’m still here. I hold the key to world peace, but somebody changed the lock. If you are looking for a status that expresses yourself, then read our collection of Attitude WhatsApp Status. I’m not single, I’m just romantically challenged. Real boyfriend sees no other females, Because his eyes are only dedicated for his girl. Of course I talk to myself! Learn to listen. For all the people who make me laugh – thank you. I am multi-talented, I can talk and piss you off at the same time. In search of sleep, sanity, and the Shire. Unfortunately, there’s a “socio” in front of it. Want more funny jokes and one-liners for your social media accounts? WhatsApp is really very versatile, don’t you think? Messaging is a huge part of peoples’ lives nowadays. I love that our effortless friendship matches my inability to answer messages on time. Why do scuba divers fall backwards into the water? If your heart was a prison, I would like to be sentenced for life. Social media is becoming more and more popular in these digital days. There are a few pages I would like to erase. Latest Funny Whatsapp status images download for friends photos wallpaper Unless you want me to be. The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off. Read more March 5, 2020. Only batteries have pluses and minuses. Tomorrow doesn’t look good either. Looking for that cool and funny WhatApp status? They use WhatsApp status to convey their message to boyfriend-girlfriend, friends, and family too. Give your WhatsApp some fun, unique, and latest status! Oh, So you wanna argue, Bring it. Maybe you’ll find a brain back there. Tap the three-dot icon in the upper right corner of the screen. Suffering. We know you’re one of us itching to update their WhatsApp status at the moment. Din dhal gaya, sham chali gayi, par mai pyasa baitha hu. What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? That way when stuff falls out, BOOM, bonus burrito. Here are some funny hashtags for Instagram. I’m not indecisive. If you are not satisfied, it`s not real love. You can also go for some short and classy lines as your cool Whatsapp statuses. I’ve been diagnosed with “awesomeness.” You might want to get checked, but I doubt you caught it. It’s my life, so keep your nose out of it. I was at a funeral and the widow asked if I would say a word. My neck, my back, my Netflix and my snacks. It’s a little fishy. Don’t worry, you’re safe. Robert Hayes Robert is a freelance editor and writer living in Colorado. Me: Did you get a haircut? Time flies like an arrow. Can I borrow a Kiss? He’s alright now. I am who I am, your approval is not needed. 3 horrible things in life: 1) Slow Internet. Hindi quotes with funny Whatsapp status image download for mobile. Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference. I refused to believe my dad was stealing from his job on the road crew, but when I got home, all the signs were there. Join the circus and grow your Social Media the fun way. Zombies are looking for brains. What did the ocean say to the shore? I was going to take over the world this morning, but I overslept. I don’t believe in miracles. I have a lot of jokes about unemployed people but none of them work. One is really heavy, the other’s a little lighter. My back is not a voicemail, say it to my face. Never give up on your dreams keep sleeping. Keep scrolling and reading. I am not perfect, but I am a limited edition. I had to stop drinking, cause I got tired of waking up in my car driving 90. Missing someone isn’t about how long it has been since you’ve seen them or the amount of time since you’ve talked. Keep it short and simple. My dealer sure has some explaining to do. Husband: Does the new one now work? Punch up your Instagram account with our list of funny Instagram bios or our other list of more funny Instagram bios. Don’T Take My Kindness As A Sign Of Weakness. I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it. Apparently I snore so loudly that it scares everyone in the car I’m driving.

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